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numeriオフレポっての?
とうとうふぇふぇもいわゆるあれだぉ。
オフ界初体験レポてゆーの?
噂のオフ界ってやつに初体験しちゃったので
淡々と紹介していこうと思うんだ。たぶんね。

今回のオフ会はnumeriという
テキストサイト界の重鎮にして神であるPATOさんが自費出版した本を
売り歩きながら全国行脚するという企画にのっとり
宇都宮界隈のヌメラーたちがPATOさんの元に集うというもので、
一目PATOさんに会いたくて会いたくてろんりぃ、いってきました。
嘘です。本当の狙いは高校生ハントです。
こっちが嘘です。信じないように。このばかちんがぐぁ。

宇都宮臭漂う餃子像の前に集まってきたのは総勢30名くらい?
ふぇふぇが唯一知っている人はtomiたんしかいなかったので
正直おどおどしながらtomiたんの後ろに見え隠れしつつ
PATOさんの上陸を待ちました。ここで女子たちはほぼ全員各々
気の利いたプレゼントを渡しだす始末。
この光景はつい最近見たことがあると思ったら
今年のバレンタインとダブっていましたデジャブー。
てゆーかふぇふぇ的には目的はあくまでも高校生ハントなので
まーしょおがないっつったらしょおがないですよね?
だから嘘ですってば。違うからほんとに。
その証拠にふぇふぇは自分が目の下のクマ核使用(隠し用だし)にかけていたサングラスをPATOさんに贈呈したくらいですものったら。
なのでPATOさんがサングラスをしている画像を見かけたら
その著作権はふぇふぇにありますのできちんと連絡するように。

でまぁ3人以上は組織の始まりと昔の人はいいことを言ったもので
もうPATOさんの回りにはある1組織ができあがってしまったわけで
こーなってくるとこれをまとめる何かが必要となってくるわけで
ダチョウ倶楽部的にはリーダー、ネプチューン的には名倉なわけで
ほとんど組織とは無縁な生活をほぼ送っているふぇふぇが
なんの因果か幹事になってしまい一同居酒屋へと導いていったのです。
てゆーかふぇふぇをよく知ってる人が聞いたらありえない話ですから。
和を乱したことはあってもまとめたことなんか生まれてから20年、
まったくないんですものつっこむなそこ。

でどうにか居酒屋にたどり着いた一行は乾杯しましたとさ。
めでたしめでたし、とか終わりにできませんか。そーですか。

オフ界に参加したのは約20人。
栃木県人の県民性的にはひっこみ自アン民ですので
みながもじもじしてた中を堂々盛り上げてくれたのが
とちぎとつくばの著者であるtomiくんでした。
僕とコーヒー牛乳の著者でもあるtomiくんでした。
ふぇふぇの掲示板で知ってる人もいると思いますが
tomi君は予告書き込みどおり、飲みまくってくれました。
その書き込みに嘘偽りなくスーパーハイテンショニングで
がっつんがっつんいっちゃってくれました。
てゆーかPATOさんが飲ませ上手。すべて言葉の最後を
「飲みが足らないからだよ」で締めくくるので
多分遺伝子のどこかに「いぢられ」キャラをインプットされてるtomiくんが
そのつっこみを拒絶できるわきゃないので
イッキに次ぐイッキ。しかもアルコール度数も強制変更。
とうとう最後にはつぶれてしまいましたとさ。めでたしめでたし。
とかで終わりにしないからね、tomiくん。
tomi君はほんとナイスな好青年でした。いい男だし、アンダー20だし、
非童貞ってゆーのがちょっとひっかかるけどそれ以外は完璧だよ君は。
でもってふぇふぇ撮影のtomiくん飲みのみMOVを今パクってきました。
「とみたんののみんぐ映像」 quick timeマスト

他の参加者の方たちはというと、正直同じテーブルに座った人と
tomiくんと共に茨城から流れてきた子とはお話したけど
男子高校生とか男子高校生とか男子高校生とは
お話できなかったのがちょとさびしかったあるよ。
勇気を振り絞れなかったあるよ。
あでも、ちょっとスキンヘッド気味の高校生男子の隣に座ってた子は
ストライクゾーンなのであとでこっそりメールくれるよおに。いじょ。

女子群はえと、正直誰ともお話できませんでした。いじょ。

ふぇふぇと同卓だった、帝京大コンビ、電通大大学院生、
小山勤務の人、身も心も社会人の風格たっぷりだった人
とてもたのしかったです。またどこかで逢えるとイイね。

てゆーか、tomi君の送迎係(名前わかんなぁい)及びtomi君
次ぎのオフ界の予定くんどくよーに。
今度はふぇふぇが自らの手でtomi君をつぶしますのだ(`−´ )
| もふもふ日常編 | 07:29 | comments(42) | trackbacks(2) |
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| - | 07:29 | - | - |
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